Nov. 29, 2013
NewsRescue– Some Humor In The ASUU Strike; students have taken to an academic excersise in humor over the prolonged ASUU University strike in Nigeria that appears to have no end in sight. The Student Forum has a growing list of contributions to the ‘newly found terminologies of ASUU.’ Avertse made the wonderful compilation below in memory of his father who passed during the strike.
ASUU Newly Found Terminologies
1) ASUU: A Union.
2) ASUUOLOGY: The study of ASUU.
3) ASUUCRAT: A member of ASUU.
4) ASUUCRACY: Government of ASUU plus Federal Government minus the students.
5) ASUUDITE: Effects of ASUU on students.
6) ASUUISM: The act of behaving like ASUU.
7) ASUUIEST: A person who doesn’t believe in ASUU.
8) ASUUING: Demanding and negotiating in ASUU’s manner.
9) ASUUNDER: Consequences of ASUU strike.
10) ASUUSTRIKER: A person who demonstrates for ASUU.
11) ASUULATOR: The war between ASUU and the senators.
12) ASUUMANIAC: Someone who loves ASUU.
13) ASUUPHOBIA: The fear of ASUU.
14) ASUUCIDE: Act of killing an Asucrat by accident.
15) ASUUTIAN: A victim of ASUU’sactivities.
16) D BINOMIAL NOMENCLATURE FOR ASUUIS= asuustrikia studsufrre spp.
17) ASUUNITY- a community full of asuucrats.
18) ASUUNESTY: The granting of pardon to ASUU members if they fail to heed to FG order.
19) ASUUEKWENMETA: the act of asuu refusing all pleas by FG to call off strike!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!.
20) Assuimunisation; vaccine taken by other universities who have not associate with ASUU.
21) Asuuinfinitum—the unending Asuu strike.
22) ASUUTHON:-The act of doing a marathon.
23) ASUULIDAY: A mandatory and indefinite holiday forced on students by ASUU.
24) ASSUTHEATRE: the re-enactment of ASSU.
25) ASUUATION: the process of ASUUING.
26) ASUUGEN generation of ASUU.
27) ASUU-NONE-FEARISM= The act of ASUU not being afraid of FG.
28) ASUUFEDJOKER: the forceful attempt by the federal govt to open varsities without ASUU’s consent.
29) ASUUBAN. The process of placing life ban on ASUU.
30) ASUUFERALIC: Another dimension of asuustrike.
31) ASUUFEAR: d act of sum unvrstys nd lctrs going bck 2 classes in compliance wit dnew FG threat.
32) ASUUCRAZY: d act of asuu goin wild wit rgrd 2 d new FG sanction on dem.
33) Asuutoxicty….harmful effect of asuu.
34) ASUUPHOBIA-the fear of asuu.
35) AsuuNol > a drug use 4 curing asuu’s Headache.
36) ASUULACATION the act of breastfeeding a student under the influence of asuu for wider brain and intellectual development.
37) Asuuemigrant …a person is a student moving from the de school to his/her house.
38) Asuuimmigrant. . . A person that moves in to a location cos of asuu strike.
39) ASUUPhronia..disease caused brought by Asuu strike.
40) Asuuphenilyn is the cure brought by Gov which isn’t competent to stop the disease from spreading and continuation but God will bring ASUUbiotic.
41) ASUUnalization: The process of undergoing a strike that lasts for up to 18 years, thereby making students permanent citizens of universities.
42) ASUUNOMICS: the study of asuu and their behaviour.
43) ASUU-BITE: the painful bite of asuu.
44) ASUUQUINE: the drugs taken to prevent the harmful infection of asuu.
45) ASUUTAINMENT: the enjoying feeling of the asuu strike.
46) ASUUFORCE: The act of forcing Asuu to call off the strike by FG without honoring the agreement.
47) ASUUGENIC = a grp of studnts dat are njoyin asuu strike.
48) ASSUMPTA CATHEDERAL: The name of the venue where Asuu hold their meetings to press home their demands.
49) ASUUUS: hiv virus found in asuunity.
50) ASUUSANE: mad people in asuunity.
51) ASUUKWO: a child given birth durin asuustrike.
52) ASUUNECTOMY…..surgery done on an asuucrat.
53) Asuucantity— the will nt let go of their initial agreement with FG.
54) Assuphillia: the love of Assuu strike.
55) Asuugnancy- pregnancy assumed to be caused by asuu.
56) ASUUMUNION- the act of pledging to ASUUISM.
57) Assupportunity cost- d act of sacrificing lecture for money 4rm FG.
58) ASUUTIS: the inflammation of asuu.
59) Asuupodia: A book that contains all ASSU histories.
60) Asuutech a school of studying asuutechnology.
61) ASSUCCANTANT-the person that strategises on assu demand 4rm FG.
62) ASUUOLOGIST-A Specialist on ASUU.
63) ASUUCELE-Protusion in ASUU.
64) ASUUKURTOSIS: the degree of peakedness of asuu strike, usually taken relative to suppose 4yr of study in the university.
COMPOSED BY AVERTSE EMMANUEL UDIBO (EMMY SAX ) IN MEMORY OF MY DADDY WHO DIED DURING THE ASUU STRIKE 25/11/2013. MR ABRAHAM IORBEE AVERTSE -NTA MAKURDI.. I LOVE YOU DAD !BUT GOD LOVES YOU MORE.. TILL WILL MEET AGAIN.