Jonathan Goes To School: A Tale of a Troublesome President

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Once upon a time there was a pupil named Jonathan.  Jonathan was quite a lucky chap and witty one too.  When his luck failed him, he made up a clever tale.  Once he said he had no shoes; he also took advantage by pretending he had no clues.  But he was just lazy and loved too much booze.

Jonathan was a truant.  He was always late to his classes and never did his homework.  While the other students studied, he surrounded himself with girls.  Fascinated by his babes and knocked out by his booze, Jonathan’s school attendance was merely a ruse.

Jonathan was a bad boy.  He was the type of student that always scaled the fence.  He would be seen in the marketplace, hanging around with other bad boys.  Jonathan loved the bad boys.  He would defend them, protect them, and surround himself with them.  When they got in trouble and were grounded, he found ways to bail them out. The hooligans loved him as he loved them. He even called them his “siblings,” and real family. He was a thug and never ashamed of it.

Jonathan was a bully.  After one of his cunning tales got him appointed as the class president, he raided the class, taking everyone’s shoes then made a shoe store. He told the class he had transformed their lives. “Look at that! Now you have a shoe store,” Jonathan beamed.

Jonathan had a friend named Bafarawa. Bafarawa was a true friend.  When the classmates wanted to pounce on Jonathan, Bafarawa said “he is still learning.”

Then one day it was time for the final exam.

Jonathan was not ready.  He had used the candle only for notorious deeds. He had burned the lamp oil only to play dice.  Jonathan had never opened a textbook.  He had never taken notes nor done any assignments.  He didn’t know his teachers names, and had no idea what the subjects were.

Jonathan planned to cheat, but he wasn’t sure he would pass.  Jonathan was sweating.  He was perplexed.  He couldn’t see his good luck or wittiness getting him out of this one.  He raided the rooms of smart students and carted away their computers and study materials, but that didn’t help.

As Jonathan got more and more desperate, he tried to bring all his classmates down so he could pass by being above the curve, but no one was listening. Not just the class, or the school but the entire community now knew Jonathan. They were all tired of his pranks.

Jonathan figured he will have to study, so he tried his best to do a crash course. He invited gangsters from neighboring towns to help him out, but that got him nowhere. He borrowed money and bought the best study tools, but it was just too late. He even bought printers to print his homework. The teacher said it was neat, but you passed your deadline.

Finally when all else failed, Jonathan figured the only way will be to get the exam postponed so he can get time to prepare.

Questions:

  • Do you think Jonathan will be successful in getting the exams postponed?
  • Do you think Jonathan can pass the exam?
  • What do you think his classmates, teachers and the community will do to Jonathan as he plays his last ‘witty’ games?

Dr. Peregrino Brimah; http://ENDS.ng [Every Nigerian Do Something] Email: [email protected] Twitter: @EveryNigerian